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Zach got me all hopped up on Sixlets today. Then I crashed super hard and got all mopey. THANKS!

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Working Hard Or Hardly Working?

Thanks to Jeff the creepy guy who asked out my manager at the Speedy Market eleven years ago.

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Two Good Shows!

Both shows were way fun tonight!

I was fifteen minutes late to the first show because I forgot my fringe pin and missed the first bus. Even that bus might not have been early enough because I miscalculated the distance between Lyndale and Hennepin at 26th. Also, my bus driver didn’t stop at the first stop after I pulled, even though I pulled almost a full block in advance. When I walked back past it there was no “Buses do not stop here” sign on the blue bus stop sign. Then it started to rain. Really, water just condensed in midair. It smelled like laundry everywhere. It was hot.

The woman in the 10-speed show was crazy crazy crazy unbelievably superlatively crazy hot. It’s a good thing that a person can stare in a play without drawing attention. Wow. The show itself was really fun and made me all nostaligic for high school. When they say “best years of your life” they mean “it only ever gets shittier.” At least you eventually get used to it.

The testicle poetry show was awesome, I swear that he rhymed motherfucking cocksucker with fucker at some point, although he denied it. Apparently he’s a high school teacher or something and a bunch of his former students showed up. They all went to Mortimers. I stopped there while waiting for my bus home and had a beer while fondling their Tornado brand foos ball awesomes.

Who knew that I still had like $10 on a stored value card from at least two years ago? My bus rides were essentially free! And long! And I missed my mp3 player because I was an idiot and didn’t bring it! I really don’t feel any more socially responsible for having ridden the bus. At least I know where the 4 really goes and I’m fairly confident that I could bus to school. That is where the real cost savings start to stack up. And I could let Lisa use my car during the day! Except that they bought a Ford Escort for $700. One house, three adults, three cars. Hmm. So riding the bus doesn’t make me feel any more responsible, but having three cars makes me feel like a douchebag. Apparently I won’t be able to get ahead.

Amusingly, Stan offered me a ride to the show. I said “that would defeat the purpose of me taking the bus.”

He replied: “you can always take the bus back.” Of course, he would have made a complete round trip in the process. He is the one who sends me doomsday “oil’s runnin’ out!” links. I just like to rock out in my car for fifteen minutes a day.

Oh yeah, people seriously keep almost accidentally hitting me with their cars. I’ve lost count. It’s a little disturbing. Stop signs are for fucking stopping, FUCK FACE!

I just can’t get away with a 3am post without some all caps swearing. It just wouldn’t be right. Not at all.

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