For those so inclined
Every year people ask me for “what I want” for my “birthday.”
After the cut, a complete list.
World peace.
Oh my god, Zappos: shoe wishlist
Amazon: Shop internetally, buy locally
Geek: Thinkgeek.com (goofy t-shirts that I would be glad to explain)
bhphoto: lenses
LOL Cats: http://apelad.blogspot.com/ Hand drawn and personal for only like $20!
Rob Ullman: Mini Pinup Books
Rose and Isabel: Magical realism during the civil war (look for the paypal link)
Kegerator kit (beer is good for you, gin is not)
A nice 4gig compact flash card (or bigger!)
A monkey
A Wacom tablet
Another cardigan, perhaps in an earthy brown
Another nice hoodie, perhaps in a charcoal or dark gray.
Hellboy comics trade paperbacks #2 or #5
Any Bureau for Paranormal Research and Defense comic or trade paperback
Preacher trade paperback #5
Doctor Who DVD box sets (the new ones!)
drawing pencils
Dixon Ticonderoga pencils
Haircut
Laptop sleeve
A monkey
A cowbell
A Marshall Stack
A gift certificate to the Electric Fetus
A case of delicous and nutritious Summit beer
A bottle of really good tequila
Deep Fryer (with cool touch outside)
Blender
Food Processor
12V cordless drill (I’m borrowing John’s until I put those doors on that cabinet. I should do that)
A gift certificate to the Inklab or Steady Tattoo
“But I want to pick something out just for you!”
Magical realism. Kafka? Mythology of some culture — I took a Mexican folklore class, it might be interesting to follow up with other regions.
You listed ” monkey” twice. So…like a real one, that poops and stuff and that you have to diaper in the house, or a stuffed one, that sits on your bed, that you can hug at night? I’ve always wanted a monkey too. No, maybe a chimp, except they get big and aggressive. Actually, I’d like to work in an animal rescue center for monkeys and chimps. No, wait, maybe I’d like to BE a monkey or a chimp. Oh, no, now I’m totally confused…………………….
If I put a diaper on it, how will it throw its own feces?
Wow, a capuchin monkey is, at the very least, $500. I agree though, that would be the best gift ever. Do you think Zach would let you take it to work? You could use our burly to take it on bike rides.
Zach said no, so it’s gonna have to be a robot monkey. Then I will have to get a tandem bike so my robot monkey could bike to work with me.
Me and my monkey, riding our bikes
I pass him a banana, I know what he likes
He passes me an orange ‘cause he likes me too
He wishes you were here ‘cause he likes you
He’s my robot mechanical monkey
He’s so happy and a little bit spunky
Won’t you pet him just a little
He might give you peanut brittle!
If you get a monkey, you will have to wear a black body leotard and we will all call you “Dieter.” And then we will leave. Quickly.
Or you will have to become a trucker, but not just any trucker, a crime solving, woman getting, chip owning trucker.
BJ and the Bear?
That’s right baby.