I forgot to mention that Cake Woman was ripping ass in the booth and aiming them at me. She’s so very classy!
The part that really makes me laugh is that the other night I let a loud one go for shits and giggles, and she turned to me and said earnestly:
“Whoa, you never fart!”
That statement was so ludicrous that it almost couldn’t be a joke. Have I been holding them that well? Well then, time to let loose and deflate my midsection. It will be nice to wear smaller pants.