Better Than a Stick In The Eye

What’s worse than being 12 years out of high school and on your way to having $40,000 in debt?
Being 30 years old, with no college degree, making $15 an hour.

Jesus, Star Tribune, thanks for making me sound like a fucking loser.

That’s why Jesse Mullan has taken a risk and gone back to college, sitting in classrooms with college juniors who were 8 years old when he graduated from St. Paul Central High in 1994.

Of course they leave out I live with a smokin’ hot girlfriend who was 12 or so when I “graduated high school” in 1994. Hellz yes. I suppose that they also leave out that I am halfway dead — I mean done. With classes. Assuming that I don’t go to grad school. In any case, last semester two of my classes were with juniors and two were with old timey grad student folks. They had curly moustaches and everything.

This was all a lot more hilarious in my head last night as I was lying in bed thinking about calling the photographer a half-blind monkey and the reporter a talentless hack, but those comments would be just plain mean, and I’m not a mean person. I was just having trouble sleeping after having spent half the weekend drifting in and out of hallucinatory unconsciousness.

Okay, that was Thursday and Friday only, but it was worth mentioning.

4 Responses to “Better Than a Stick In The Eye ”

  1. What? You’re 30?

    You so off my friends list.

  2. I drink at a 24 year old level, thankyouverymuch.

  3. Don’t worry… Pam only likes you more now.

  4. and he ate a cupcake, and it was good

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