Just Cut It Off, Already
Yesterday my knee hurt. I woke up this morning at 6am or so with my knee so cramped up that I couldn’t move it. I hobbled to the bathroom and back, trying to be quiet, but when I crawled into bed again it was all I could do to not gouge out my own eyes just to take my mind off of my knee. Of course I couldn’t be quiet enough, but instead of waking up and killing me for waking her up, Cake Woman got me an ice pack. This morning she made me coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I had a midterm today. I thought that I had left my regular glasses in the car, so I wore my sunglasses for the test and then took the campus connector bus to the parking lot where I found my glasses in one of the other pockets of my bag. Hooray. I bused back and hobbled to the architecture building (which is poorly designed for persons of limited mobility) and caught the teacher just leaving. Whoops. It had taken almost 40 minutes to travel about a mile and a half.
If I cut off my leg, I can get a peg leg. Every woman wants a pirate for a boyfriend, and this is a good start.
I’ve had a peg leg for two years now. I’ve got to say that it was the best thing for me in the department of ladies since we men found out they like flowers.
ROFLBERRY PWNCAKES!