Weekend Plans

What am I doing this weekend? Everyone wants to know! (No one wants to know, booooooo)

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By Thursday they mean Friday

Stan came upstairs to hand me the phone today while I was still firmly entrenched in my beauty sleep.

Qwest: Hello, this is Qwest, it looks to us like your DSL is working.
Me: Is it raining?
Qw: What?
Me: Is it raining… outside?
Qw: I don’t know.
Me: I don’t think that it is. Nope, it’s not.
Qw: Okay…
Me: If it isn’t raining, there won’t be a problem.
Qw: Oh. What?

Do these people just pull up any old ticket and dive in without looking at the history… at all?

Does this ever happen?

Qw: I see that service has been disconnected, so I turned it back on, and I’m sorry for any inconvenience
Me: What? No, I had called to have it disconnected in the first place.
Qw: I’m sorry, sir, is there anything that we can do to regain your business?
Me: Uh, you still have my business. It’s my great uncle who’s the dead guy.
Qw: Uhhh… I’m sorry about that.
Me: His house burned to the ground. O! Uncle Jimmy! O!
Qw: Oh. Uh.
Me: I hate you, Qwest, I really do.

This is why I don’t normally post quite so early in the morning. It just ends up being weird.

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Fuck you gently

jm d30 3171774

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You get me so wet


At some point today it seemed like a good idea to walk home from school. According to google pedometer, that is 3.89 miles, so contrary to what some people might say, I’m not sane and normal at all. The only way that more liquid could have gotten into my shirt is if I were to dive into Noah’s wading pool while wearing it, which actually would not have been a bad idea. Instead I turned today into another two-shower day and then took the nap that had been calling me since three AM.

I was hoping to take Noah up to the park for swimming, but he has a big boo boo on his shin, so he shouldn’t swim in the communal pool. We’ll jump around in the backyard pool and maybe fire up the slip and slide. Anyone and everyone is welcome to come and remember why summer is awesome.

Since “anyone and everyone” is mostly people who will be reading this from other time zones or continents, I feel reasonably confident that those people will not be getting me terribly drunk tonight, the night before my final — although waking up after blacking out in a kiddie pool is a great story to close out my twenties — especially if it was some stranger’s kiddie pool.

“Where are my pants?”

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Hard Times

I forgot to mention that I had a gigantic and delicious muffin at the Hard Times Cafe after yon Brendan Benson show. I was reasonably drunk, so I was getting delicious crumbs all over myself. It was the awesome. What I can’t wrap my mind around is why the girl at the next table took my picture with her camera phone when she thought that I was not paying any attention. Did she think that I was cute? Was she amused because I was talking loudly about how colored hair, tattoos, and piercings didn’t mean anything anymore? Did she just want a picture of that asshole drunk guy talking shit way too loud in a place he didn’t belong because it was open and he was crazy hungry. Why would a person have a camera phone in the Hard Times anyway?

Who was the wiry guy with the dreads and the blood on his hand who came and sat next to her and her friend? Why did he have blood on his hand? Did he think I was cute? Did he ask about me?

Really, I just want to see that picture. Maybe they were taking a picture of Stan, anyway.

I’m on the last problem of this last homework. My brain is starting to crack. I think that I will skip the discussion section and work and just go home and take a nap.

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See?

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I know what I’m doing next week

Minnesota Fringe

Finally, this year I am GOING.

So, aside from all the shows with nudity warnings, what should I go see?
Adventures in Mating was recommended by a friend of Marsha’s

I think that Cake Woman recommended the Scrimshaw brothers, but I only got four hours of couch sleep last night, so don’t believe anything that comes out of my mouth. Or my fingers.

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My smoke alarm is confused

I’m not on fire, I’m just really hot. Maybe I should put some pants on.

I definitely did not get enough sleep.

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Hooray!

img 1813

I just proved that Santa is NP-Complete!

I NEED TO GO TO BED.

Notice that I am shouting.

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Random Notes

  • The P is for POWER
  • Why are the flags at half mast today at the U?
  • I do not want to do my CSci 4011 homework
  • Tonight is National Night Out, so I should go home
  • Tonight is happy hour for a departed coworker, so I should go out
  • Friday Dallas Orbiter plays at the Varsity
  • Saturday I go do the College Drunk Fest thing at Paul’s parent’s house in Saint Cloud
  • I steal all my humor from Penny Arcade wholesale

Argh. Okay, so I go home, change, go out, don’t drink too much, then go home and stay up all night to do this homework. OR I stay here in the nerd room and swear a lot because this is the most tedious homework ever.

Plan A it is! See you later, G!

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