Things My Boss Says

“A moustache phone? How great would that be?”

Indeed.

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It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time

Sarah and I spent the afternoon and evening with Donald and Chandler. When we returned from a walk, Donald offered to feed us. For me he had sauerkraut and bacon potato salad. It was odd and sweet. Fast forward a few hours to the point where Sarah had fallen asleep in my bed while reading The Drawing of the Dark by Tim Powers. I accidentally woke her up while fixing the blankets. Then, well, bacon might be a traditional ingredient of sauerkraut, but let’s just say that persons wishing to include such a combination should consider spending the next few days outdoors… in a Superfund site.

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To Be Honest, I Hadn’t Made Plans

I called Sarah tonight to let her know that I had a whole roll of her film ensleeved in a plastic negative page thing. Right. She asked what I was going to be up to tonight. I don’t remember for sure if I had yet eaten my advanced bachelor chow yet: leftover rice from Tariq (up the street), rice and chicken from Sarah’s house (a totally different kind), some bacon and eggs hash from a week or so ago, and a half a gallon of Huy Fong Chili Garlic Sauce. Apply microwaves, do a dance in your underpants, take out the trash, and eat while watching scratchy network programming roll up your television. I had to toss out the uncooked bacon, which implies to me that it had not enough nitrates in it — or I am not eating bacon fast enough. It was expensive pork tummy, too, so I’d say the latter. Note to self: eat bacon nonstop.

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Woke Up the Same So I Slept In Again

Picture pages picture page time to get your pens and your pixels.

This meat store is no more:
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All Right, Minneapolis, We’re Gonna Do This!

It’s you and me, Handy Andy

Okay, so maybe I am flat busted broke. Shit happens. This will not stop me, though, for I have a cupboard full of beans and rice for the eating, plus veggie burgers and whole cut up chickens in the freezer. I am prepared for the long winter of summer — plus, I spent all winter putting on a layer of blubber under my fur to keep me warm in the bitterest of cold. However, I can’t very well entertain with no food, no booze, and a 13 inch television. I can’t very well feed my own blubber to guests… or can I?

No matter, for John made Christmas in May happen: a 12 pack assortment of fresh Summit beers. If only I would have moved to a location suitable for the similar acquisition of free entertainment. Oh yeah, it’s Steven’s Square, the new art district. I am totally restraining myself from swearing like a sailor on leave in hell. I felt all guilty for moving away from Northeast because I knew that I would be farther away from Art-A-Whirl and the slew of bars up dere in Nordeast, but if you read this post, you can find out all of the things that I want you to come do with me.

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I Hope You’re Awake

8am was jackhammer time today. Suddenly I’m glad that I got up early. Imagine my anger if I would have been wrapped in the gentle arms of slumber when the racket started. As it stands I have already consumed my delicious coffee. Mmm. Coffee.

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The Law and The Order

Ugh. Last night’s Criminal Intent was all sorts of terrible. Sarah made dinner while I looked at lenses and digital bodies in various paper and online catalogs. I might be broke, but you have to look forward or up or something if you want to get there — like steering a car: look where you want to go, not where you want to avoid.

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Do You Miss My All Time Lows?

A week or so ago Sarah was gone to North Dakota for a week, which meant a 600% increase in bachelordom for me. I fully intended to spend the week in my underpants wearing a bacon hat, drinking beers nonstop and watching hours and hours of uninterrupted Bruce Lee movies. I considered myself a B Sandwich — you know, like a BLT, only without the lettuce or tomato. Meat is just a long term food storage mechanism. Just like beer. Beer is food. I am “eating” right now.

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Why Didn’t I Go Into Physics?

rubixsqube: I am currently calculating the angular size distance of an object at redshift z = 1,089 that holds 2*10^15 solar masses

I’m so gonna marry that guy.

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Fart-A-Whirl

Sarah keeps calling it a “studio crawl,” but somehow that doesn’t conjure up the pomp and circumstance of live bands and other ridiculousness that happens in Northeast. There was much bicycle.
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