Happy Birthday, Mission Accomplished
It’s been three years since we won the war in Iraq. Hooray!
Powersurge
I heard a rumor today that Radio K is going to ruin change their logo. Nonetheless, I still found it in my heart to buy a couple of watts (because I try not to be a complete leech all the time). At first I was planning on calling from the All Request Hour headquarters in the Whole down in the basement of Coffman because Zach and I have made a habit of going down and harrassing the staff. However, they were jerks who wouldn’t play my requests out of time, so whatever.
Free Food
The other day we had an employee banquet at work, where we feasted upon the flesh of junior employees.
He’s gone, man, he’s just gone
So I’m watching Mythbusters and I see the ad for the “Meat Missile” episode. Of course I had to share that news with Zach, who had some new of his own.
jessepmullan: there’s meat everywhere
Zach: I’m not going to sleep
Zach: I’m just going to watch Lost
jessepmullan: hhahaahaha
jessepmullan: how many episodes in are you?
Zach: “episodes?”
Zach: I’m on an island man
Zach: and I’m lost
I No Longer Desire A Pony
Cake Woman woke me up at a painful hour on Sunday to help her make cupcakes in honor of her mother’s birthday. Then we did the early preparations for crème brûlée and tested out her new blowtorch.
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Not Helping U
My mother just got a letter saying that our reapplication for the SELF loan was declined because we had already gotten the maximum amount for the year.
I have been calling “Helping U” for days now. Here is an example of the conversations:
“Hello, my name is Jesse Mullan. I would like to inquire as to the status of my financial aid.”
“What? I don’t understand what you are asking. Financial what?”
My Car Is Dead
Zach fired me twice while I was telling Cake Woman, and then she hung up on me.
This is the best day ever.
Motherfucking Pumping Lemma Like a Motherfucker
Just when I thought that I had seen the last of it, there it was again, the pumping lemma smack dab in the middle of my Computational Complexity homework. Well, at the start, anyways. If you’re wondering, I swear a lot when my brain starts to mush up from abstract thought. This actually isn’t that bad — last summer (or the summer before) when I proved that Santa was NP complete, I later swore such a blue streak — no, a black streak that the very fabric of existence split in twain and hell was unleashed upon earth.
Oh! I thought that demon from the portal today looked familiar!
We got this email at work
Subject: TCSU/SAO Feedback Form
Question :
Nagaan isiniif yaa ta’u! dhaabi akkasii jiraachuusaatiif gamachuu nati dhagaahame ibsaa, akkaataa miseensa ta’u itti danda’u naaf ibsaa.
Website_Error : This is regarding an error on the website
Anyways, so Zach read the email out loud and a dark portal opened to hell. The upside is that we have a pet demon in the office now. His name is N’topoleth, but we call him (it?) Nat.