New Frontiers in Swearing

At the advice of my mother, I called the nurse line. At the advice of the nurse line, I had Sarah take me to urgent care, where the ibuprofen wore off just in time for the doctor to torture me. I was flat on my back on the exam table with a white cloth draped over my special purpose.

“Does this hurt?” she asked while picking my leg up at the ankle.

“Yes! That hurts!”

This went on for some time.

“How about this?” she asked while folding my leg behind my head.

Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?”

“It’s just tendonitis. You’re fine,” she said.

I sat up and shook on the table.

I’m finally home with naproxen and acetaminophen. For those people who worry about such things, I asked both the doctor and the pharmacist about their interactions and amounts. For those of you who would take joy in it, I’m still in a largish amount of pain.

I no longer feel like someone is prying my knee apart with a Buick.

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MF Grape

My knee is getting worse. Soon I will need a cane, then crutches, then a scamp, then Sarah will catheterize me and strap me into a wheelchair.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=01UIB2X-WK0


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Killa Kneez

I woke up this morning with the same sort of knee pain from two years ago. Then, I woke up in the middle of the night with the pain at a level of eight or nine on a one to ten scale. This morning I woke up with it at a two or three, but since arriving at work it has escalated to a glorious five or six.

Wu Tang, Wu Tang, Wu Tang.

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I Am Feeling Fairly Smug

Today we had the sort of weather for which Minnesota is not famous: sunny, breezy and warm-yet-not-too-warm. I took advantage of it by slipping into my new stripy cardigan and strolling across campus to Onestop. On the way I saw university police officers rolling past on their bicycles and thought to myself that maybe I would just be arrested once I set foot in Frasier Hall.

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These Teeth Are Clean

I left the dental office with another scheduled appointment in three months, another new toothbrush, more dental floss, and a second, specialized, supplementary toothbrush.

“You have a very strong tongue,” I was told. Whoa. “It’s pushing your toothbrush so that you aren’t brushing well enough on the insides of your lower teeth. I’m only telling you this to save you from future dental surgery.”

Good to know. Wait — future dental surgery?

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Hey Onestop!

You know, I think the best way to prepare for a visit to Onestop is a visit to the dentist, which is what I just did. Now that I’m used to pain, it’s time for a sojourn across campus. The Onestop people prepared by looking me up and visiting my personal website, which is the blog that you are reading right now.

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Rob Ruinits

This is not my drawing:
Untitled-1

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Maybe Helping U

Today is, I believe, Tuesday, which makes yesterday Monday. I was supposed to get a call from the guy in Onestop [Not] Helping You on Friday by noon, but somehow that translated into “I’m sorry that I didn’t call back, but I wanted to make sure that I knew bla bla bla…” If a customer is already irate and you don’t follow through by the time that you say you will — even if just to say “no news, but you’re my top priority,” then obviously said customer is not your top priority. I called two extra times on Friday but didn’t get him on the phone.

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A New Retaining Wall

I received an email today:

Hey John

I have attached the sketch, If there is anything else I can do let me know.

Thank you,

Clint

mullan residence

To the best of my knowledge, I’m not in the market for retaining walls for my apartment, but I replied anyway, in my characteristic style. I await his response with baited breath.

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Financial Updates

I got a letter from the University telling me that my student account is now past due. Past due accounts lead to being dropped from your classes. Can they drop me five days before my final?

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