Take That, Liver!

Actually, my liver got the last laugh by teaming up with my kidneys to remove alcohol from my bloodstream faster than I could drink it. Mother FUCKER. There’s nothing like going to bed on a crappy self-inflating mattress pad while all sweaty, sober, and lonely. Don’t, and I mean don’t go look at the fucking stars by yourself out on a dock as the Mississippi drifts by, idly investigating the tips of your toes with waves like tiny fingers.

Later, Paul and Doni and I sat together, and that was pretty nice. We saw shooting stars and maybe a satellite. Then we all passed out, the last ones left alive. Well, everyone else had just gone home because somehow the drunken motivation had slipped away from the group.

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Take Your Top Off!

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He was super pissed.

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But you know that already. Pictures later. Where is his camera phone?

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I’m Losing My Edge

It’s only nine days until I turn 30. At that point I will be forced to do my closest impression of an adult. I could start wearing a tie again. I’ve been trying to write something about growing old all afternoon, but this is all that I could get down.

The only part of hangovers that I actually dislike is when my heart pounds and pounds.

Time to get my shit together and head off to Saint Cloud. I’m going to get revenge on my liver for some crimes that I will make up on the way. I don’t need justification.

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Palmcorder Yajna

Fucking sweet, amazon.com has this song available for download.

I don’t know if the lyrics mean anything at all but the song makes me feel good and sad and happy and all mixed up inside.

Hey, wait, you can also download it straight from the goats themselves, over here: http://www.weshallallbehealed.com/song.html.

Oh, and lyrics here: http://www.themountaingoats.net/lyrics/wsabh_lyr.html#yajna.

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Holt boulevard

I am so drunk right now. John and Jolene dropped me off. I don’t think that they knew how bad my hiccups would be, but such is the life of a PBR drinker. Not that I was drinking it before I got to Gerg’s house. Oh, I am such a fucking loser, to be drunk at another person’s 30th birthday. So many people were turning 30 in the next couple of weeks.

I can’t stop with the hiccups. I’m not irresponsible, I’ve just eliminated as much responsibility as I can.

I have the hiccups super bad.

There was some confirmation that I was cute tonight, but only from women who are dating my friends, and they might have been lying.

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I’m ready

Saddle ‘er up, let’s go for a ride!

I shaved and everything! Actually, funny story: while I was shaving, Stan played “Needle in the Hay.” Hilarity ensued.

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I’m a model!

I’m also a hand model somewhere on one of the sites that we do at work.

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